deeper than words

shared my vulnerabilities,
paid no dividends.
handed you the knife,
hilt first, just so
you could effortlessly cut me deep.
watching you doing so
with no regards.
—
scars
left to be healed on their own,
no thanks to you.

you and I,
similar in some ways.
toxic behaviors,
wanting to control
and mad when we can’t.
stubbornness in what the silence tells us,
not good enough.

you’ll tear yourself apart
for your turn
to love someone,
never-ending circles.

desires deeply rooted,
irrelevant by the feeling of love.
a tug of war between impulses,
putting everything at risk.
a hunger so deep,
to taste your sweet skin
to feel your softness
you keep hidden from the world.

love stories,
temporary chapters
with options to renew.
—
no more grey.
if you’re all in
I need you to be so,
no open doors.

yearning for you
in all the places you once were,
remnants are the only thing left.
wondering if you’ll be back.

uncertain of the future
just know,
I want you in it.

I used to think it was a curse,
to feel so deeply.
a curse, of being aware of more
pretending as if less was good enough.

—
perhaps not condemned,
realizing I just want you
and nothing else will do.

ominous sky
full of uncertainty.
the night reluctantly transcending
relinquishing secrets.
clues left everywhere,
if you pay attention,
all can be pieced together.

a frigid breeze
from a door left open
stinging the bare skin.
familiarity within the feeling,
strong is the power of knowledge.